Fireworks

So I look in your direction with lights flashing and dancing in your eyes… The eyes I yearn to look at when I’m alone at night or in a crowd with faces that aren’t yours.

Yeah, I’ve always been waiting for you. Do you see me? Do you hear me?

Do I need to make it louder and clearer? You’re something beyond my years. I couldn’t start to explain what this is with you.

You’re someone I’d paint a million sunsets for. I’d drive hundreds of miles to see you.

Nothing could be better than the moments I’ve shared with you… My stomach drops thinking… just thinking…

I laugh at your lame jokes and feel my heart flutter at the sweet melody of your voice.

The alcohol coursing through your veins that I taste on your lips seems to have given you a little something new… Now you’re singing. You’ve only done this once before. I don’t think you remember serenading me that day, but this is better with your shy little gleam…

I can’t help the blood rising on my cheeks. I can’t help the way my heart does a backflip with every little lyric you sing in my ear. Paradise is when I’m with you…

I feel fear clutch my heart as an attempt to hold onto some sort of control, but it’s as if your love has become a repellent to that need… There’s no need for that control anymore.

Not with you.

How crazy am I at this point? Insane? Maybe? In love? Definitely.

I’m looking at fireworks in awe of their beauty, but the real firecracker is beside me. I can’t look away from you as hard as I could try to… The one I look to in awe of his humanity… That’s you. You’re more than what meets the eye. Your surface is beautiful but nothing compared to the core.

Every firework above us goes off with power… yet they’re fleeting. They come and go followed by more… No two are the same. They’re all beautiful, nonetheless. See, I’m not afraid of time, because I know we aren’t a single firework. We’re a show of lights without intention of ending a moment sooner than intended.

See… No two of our memories are the same. Yet, they go on and off like the fireworks above us. They’re followed by more each time, and they’re all beautiful. They aren’t permanent, but their length doesn’t diminish their existence. I guess that’s a thing… I know memories are moments in time. Their existence and importance, however, is still real and held dear. I hold them dear the same way I still see the patterns and lights going off behind closed eyes. What has passed isn’t erased. I revisit us in ways I couldn’t start to explain.

I promise you this. I’m sensitive. I cry. I fear.

I’ll be scared of losing you… But so be it. Sometimes I’ll hide. Sometimes I’ll be weak and need you to fall on, and I know you won’t run unless it’s to my side. I hope you’ll catch me when I stumble. I guess I just have that confidence in what we have.

I just never meant to be trouble. I hope you know that.

I’ll never let my fears stop me from enjoying the fireworks, though. I look at you, and I see a light show nothing could ever compare to. I have the best view, and I’d never give that up. I hope you know that, too.

I want to be good to you. I want to show you sparks I never imagined I’d ever show anyone.

Maybe you’ll understand me a little more somehow or know if you could possibly still see the sparks I see day in and day out in a lifetime that paints you by my side.

If you want that, anyways.