The wait is over.
BADLANDS is finally out. It's been quite a wait, but was it worth it? The most enticing album of the summer was
definitely worth the wait. Every song plants these images in your head, and you can't help but connect with her. She sings about things that elicit a reaction. Badlands is essentially a trip inside Ashley AKA Halsey's mind, where you experience her inner struggle and thoughts. She puts memories to music and paper, immortalizing them, but you spend the album experiencing it with her in an all too real way. The album consists of 16 tracks, which I'll talk about below. Beware, I
will ramble on.
Disclaimer: I'm not trying to interpret her music as more than what it is to me. I'm not saying that my interpretations match her own. Everyone may experience her album differently, but that's the beauty of music. Anyways, here we go!
1.
Castle: It's the opener, and it definitely starts us off on the right path... because we're suddenly headed straight to the castle with her. It was one hundred percent empowering. It's almost a visual experience, really. The first time I heard it I couldn't help visualize this song. The little noises of creaking doors and a string of electricity created a sort of story in my mind. "I'm headed straight for the castle / They wanna make me their queen / And there's an old man sitting on the throne that's saying that I probably shouldn't be so mean / I'm headed straight for the castle / They've got the kingdom locked up / And there's an old man sitting on the throne that's saying I should probably keep my pretty mouth shut." Overall, this song had me feeling too many things to even put down... I felt empowered, though, and I wanted to kick down anyone from their throne and let them know they couldn't tell me who I was. My feminist heart fluttered welcoming the jab at sexism.
Score: 10/10
2.
Hold Me Down: Previously released, this song was a nice follow up. It felt real. After having almost symbolically sang you can't hold me down, she literally sings hold me down. I mean isn't that how life rolls, though, with that inner struggle? You see her show that she's not always the one in control. Just like you basically roll with the punches, so does she. It felt real is all that comes to my mind. The song itself felt like looking at a toxic relationship--if it could be called that--one where she's held down by this guy who just fills her up with sweet words every time she's looking to leave. There's clearly a physical attachment expressed in the song, and it feels stronger than the emotional type. "I sold my soul to a three-piece / And he told me I was holy / He's got me down on both knees / But it's the devil that's tryna / Hold me down, hold me down" felt like a welcomed situation, though, where she wasn't quite looking to fall in love. She welcomed the sexual aspect of the relationship, wanting more. She isn't blaming this guy as she sings "Saying that I want more, this is what I live for / Selfish, taking what I want and call it mine." She talks about her demons, though, expressing the inner struggle dealing this situation, and while it's hard to explain what I felt with this song, it's one of those songs you just sing. It's good, and you just like it.
Score: 9/10
3.
New Americana: This song has been around for sometime, but I was excited to listen to it with the rest of the album. It's still an anthem. It's the type of song you gather up a huge crowd and walk around a city singing to, because you just do. "We are the new Americana / High on legal marijuana / Raised on Biggie and Nirvana / We are the new Americana" is the verse we've all been tweeting from the beginning. The song itself, is more than that verse, though. It makes me think of people and how stereotyped we all are. We're either one thing or another, or simply whatever we look like... but I don't think anyone is ever so... one-layered. It felt like an homage to our generation, really, and the role that music has come to play. It's ever present, it inspires us, and it shapes us. We're all quite fruitful... "They're Monaco and Hamptons bound but we don't feel like outsiders at all," was the first line that got to me and made me notice the diversity she highlights in her lyrics, regarding our generation, and how yet we're all one in the same. It's also quite nice, because it reminds me of being younger and all of the music my brother and family exposed me to. Having music around me really shaped me, the way I was exposed to practically everything. It got my mind rolling, so hey New Americana, you remind me of being 5!
Score: 9/10
4.
Drive: This is the song I've been listening to and singing every day in the car as I drive... the irony, right? I can't decide, because I swear this has to be my favorite song, right? Anyways, I absolutely adore this song. It makes me think of a time in when I was completely myself and confident while being with someone else, which I've always just found extremely difficult... not being myself, but staying myself and happy. Relationships don't always work out, and well back to the song! This song makes me happy, because I think about the length of this relationship I once had. I think about the feeling of belonging with lines like, "And California never felt like home to me / Until I had you on the open road and now we're singing." I think of how I had a partner and friend in this individual who understood me and just didn't misinterpret me. There was bliss in his lips and in the way that he spread this warmth across my body. The entirety of the relationship felt like a nice car ride with those fun speed bumps that aren't quite painful when you're the driver. Then it ends, and you hear the rain. Suddenly it's over. I remember how we sat there waiting for a sign, but we wouldn't say what we felt, and we didn't fight; we just let go. By the end of it we just drove away from each other, "All we do is think about the feelings that we hide / All we do is sit in silence waiting for a sign / Sick and full of pride / All we do is drive." We just drove and drove away.
Score: 11/10
5.
Hurricane: This song holds a special place to me, because it reminds me that I'm someone who has made mistakes, but I'm not filth. I'm a girl who can't be judged badly for something men are praised for. It reminds me of this guy that I knew when I had gone through a break up. I was naive, and wanted to feel something. I can look back and say it was destructive and toxic on my part. I knew he was bad news. He wasn't bad, but he was going to be trouble, and I knew that. He had girls in every city, but he saw something in me, and I took a chance. He thought he could control me, but I switched the rules of his game, and he found out "I'm a wanderess / I'm a one night stand / Don't belong to no city / Don't belong to no man / I'm the violence in the pouring rain / I'm a hurricane." I remember knowing he could "devastate me," and it only made me go in faster. It reminds me of a pained time, but I also look at it and own it. I think I went into it wanting to be a victim, but I came out of it realizing I wasn't the accessory I was conditioned to believe.
Score: 10/10
6.
Roman Holiday: This song makes me think of a short-lived romance. The kind with the fleeting flame, that could have been something much more had the timing been right. I think of the unlucky good guy who isn't exactly great yet, but he was good to you. The timing was off, and you met him a little before he became the guy he would after you. This makes me think of that. He came along after the hurricane, and he'll be left with the remnants of his heart that you left on your rampage. In the moment, that doesn't matter, though, because "we know that we're headstrong / And our heart's gone / And the timing's never right / But for now let's get away / On a Roman holiday."
Score: 9/10
7.
Ghost: The holy grail, or the birth. We all know this song in and out, because for quite some time it was much like her theme song, and we couldn't wait for the follow up. Anyways, this song embodies inner struggle to me. It felt like those times when you're looking for something in someone, hoping, but you realize it isn't there. This reminds me of a lot of people, too many people. Friends, family, lovers... lovers is such an awkward word to me. I don't know what else to call them, though. Back to the song, though, it essentially makes me think of all the times I've held onto people who i should have let go of sooner than I did, but because I thought of the ghost that they used to be, I just couldn't. I wasn't a victim, however, because I was as aware as they were, but I kept holding on,"And I swear I hate you when you leave / But I like it anyway." I mean that all came to an end, obviously, but I do have a habit of once I care for someone, I don't give up on them, so it's hard to let go. There's a verse, that reminds me of one particular individual, though, and it's one of my favorites, because I think back to him, and it makes me proud to say that's far behind me, but also I just love it. That's "You're a Rolling Stone boy / Never sleep alone boy / Got a million numbers / And they're filling up your phone, boy. / I'm off the deep end, sleeping / All night through the weekend. / Saying that I love him but / I know I'm gonna leave him."
Score: 10/10
8.
Colors: This song is the song that I've lost myself to too many times already, today specifically, and I could sing all day on a stage, spinning in circles. "You're dripping like a saturated sunrise
/ You're spilling like an overflowing sink / You're ripped at every edge but you're a masterpiece," makes me think of how people sound good on paper, but that doesn't mean they're good for you. Your ideal match isn't always ideal. Anyways, I love blue, so while blue is usually interpreted as sad... I don't see it that way. I think of someone who is a bit different than what your friends expected you to end up with. He's just so alluring, though. I'm into someone's character, so that always just comes first. This guy has got that and then some. His quirks, everything is blue now that he's got you. He's like a flowing stream full of life. He was so drawn to you. He smiles, and it's like he could shatter with all the unspoken words he holds in that simple smile, but you could melt in the way his hand ever so delicately falls on the small of your back when you're standing together. Then there's the times he grips your hips like he's devoid of life, trying to steal your last breath, sharing the red with your blue. He ignites the fire inside. You can't help look at him as he lies in bed with the perfect amount of sunlight highlighting his features, tangled in sheets. You're both great until you're not. Suddenly the mix just isn't right, and he's changed his mind. You're not the girl he first knew, "You were red and you liked me 'cause I was blue / You touched me and suddenly I was a lilac sky
/ And you decided purple just wasn't for you."
Score: 11/10
9.
Colors, Pt. 2: I can't express how much I adore this song. It's so simple, and it's like some sort of overdose music type of deal, right? It's so great, though! All I think is post "Colors." While part opened up with a livelier sound, essentially bliss, this one has a slowed down type of flashback feel to it. It makes me think of that moment in when the bliss ends, when the relationship ends. I think back to the moment the red has vanished, and you're left on your own again. "Everything is blue," and that's not a bad thing, but you're left to deal with the aftermath. In this case, it doesn't feel bad. It feels like the remnants of a past flame as they finally extinguish. The track closes with a static vibe. Everything you felt just feels like it's being dismantled, and I love that.
Score: 10/10
10.
Strange Love: Yes! It's explicitly unapologetic, and I want to sing this to a few people. Everyone is so concerned with knowing everything about everyone. She starts singing, "Everybody wants to know / If we fucked on the bathroom sink / How your hands felt in my hair / If we were high on amphetamines," and it makes me want to be her back up singer. We're inspired by our experiences, so we write about it. People get a whiff of it, though, and they think they know it all. Suddenly people feel entitled, just because it's in an article or song, and it doesn't work that way. Judge away, but I don't owe you anything; "They think I'm insane, they think my lover is strange / But I don't have to fucking tell them anything, anything / And I'm gonna write it all down, and I'm gonna sing it on stage / But I don't have to fucking tell you anything, anything." It's even worse when people assume and conjure this whole scenario up, and it spreads. Everyone could be wrong, but suddenly they're all convinced and waiting, so I love this verse, "Everybody's waiting up to hear if I dare speak your name / Put it deep beneath the track, like the hole you left in me / And everybody wants to know 'bout how it felt to hear you scream / They know you walk like you're a god, they can't believe I made you weak."
Score: 10/10
11.
Coming Down: This song feels like a seesaw. It feels like a tittering point in a relationship with the highs and lows, as she refers to "I found God / I found him in a lover," and later saying, "I found the Devil / I found him in a lover." She goes back and forth between the good and bad, throughout the song. The relationship, itself, is coming down, though. It feels like one of those inevitable ends, where you know it's going to end, but you try to push that back. You know it won't last, but you hope, or try, even when you feel like a fool for doing so.
Score: 8/10
12.
Haunting: Okay, this has to be my favorite, right now. I'm trying so hard to pick, but this song has to be tied for my favorite, at least for now. I'm starting to feel like she's dipped into my memories, mistakes, heart, questions, and she's just written this amazing album that I will listen to every day. So, I'm not going to bother with incorporating the lyrics into my ramble about this song, this time. I'm just going to put a portion of them below... because I just can't. I'm mentally twitching with how much I love this. This just reminds me of me...? I'm telling you... I sound like a broken record. I just think back to the relationship that I referred to with "Drive" and kind of the build up that followed after that time. I think of mistakes, and how I don't want to look back at them, because I'm aware that they cut deep... It was like a circle. I think back, and think about that feeling of just wanting someone in your life; longing for them even though you know it'll hurt. I really can't even sum this one up. I was not ready for this.
I was as pure as a river
But now I think I'm possessed
You put a fever inside me
And I've been cold since you left
I've got a boyfriend now and he's made of gold
And you've got your own mistakes in a bed at home
I'm hoping you could save me now but you break and fold
You've got a fire inside but your heart's so cold
'Cause I've done some things that I can't speak
And I've tried to wash you away but you just won't leave
So won't you take a breath and dive in deep
'Cause I came here so you'd come for me
I'm begging you to keep on haunting
I'm begging you to keep on haunting me
I'm begging you to keep on haunting
I know you're gonna keep on haunting me
We walk as tall as the skyline
And we have roots like the trees
But then your eyes start to wander
'Cause they weren't looking at me
You weren't looking for me
Score: 11/10
13.
Gasoline: She's aware of the machine; she's aware. It makes me think of when something highly impacts you, like how her music has skyrocketed her into fame, and you get this new type of awareness regarding your surroundings. You're more cautious about who you let in, but you also don't care about what they want you to be, at least in her case, and you grow into yourself even more. She acknowledges that the voices won't leave her alone, but there seems to be a I don't give a fuck attitude spitting at what society thinks as she asks, "Are you insane like me? Been in pain like me? / Bought a hundred dollar bottle of champagne like me? / Just to pour that motherfucker down the drain like me? / Would you use your water bill to dry the stain like me?" She gets that she's not what people are used to, but she's experienced life regardless of what people say concerning her age. She doesn't care about money, and she's not here to be part of the machine. She continues to push people, as they continue to disapprove, and she acknowledges it saying, "Do the people whisper ‘bout you on the train like me? / Saying that you shouldn't waste your pretty face like me?," but she doesn't show signs of wanting to please them. It feels like someone trying to hammer into your head. It's this mental observation type of moment. I like it. It's that song that I think anyone could connect to. We're all misfits in our own way, challenging the machine, with flaws in our codes.
Score: 9/10
14.
Control: We're back to square one, with the visualization taking full control. I can close my eyes and there's this rattling sort of sound, like someone dragging a can across an old black gate... The view goes into the castle, though, and there she stands. Different from "Castle," now Halsey is in the castle looking more like she does now. Her journey apparent in her new demeanour, but there's pain and fear etched in her surroundings. One second she's alone on this throne singing as if she's in complete control, but then she looks like the inner struggle in her head won't let her win, and she's just throwing all of these things, everything shattering. The visual basically ends with her losing it, makeup smeared, smiling insanely, clawing at herself, and then she goes under this black water in a bathtub. It looks like an episode straight from American Horror Story. Then she opens her eyes, and she's back to the initial point, with rattling outside, but her demons are underwater for now, and she's regained control. It just reminds me of Bring Me The Horizon in a way. I think of a time when I felt my demons clawing at my throat, and it's crazy when I listened to this. It was like wondering if this was what I saw myself as, especially when regaining control felt like a never ending battle, "I can't help this awful energy / Goddamn right, you should be scared of me / Who is in control? / I paced around for hours, I'm empty / I jumped at the slightest of sounds / And I couldn't stand the person inside me."
Score: 10/10
15.
Young God: This song makes me think of desire and wanting to be larger than life. I think back to a time when I had this friend, and we would sit at night at the pool with our feet dangling, or we would go in deep. We'd look up at the sky, and he'd hold my hand. There was this understanding between us. It's not something that you can verbalize, but it was like a silent agreement. We'd drown in the moonlight at night with the little pool lights. We'd drive around together in this white car; he always told me how he saw me leaving this place. We were tired of the what we should be. We would talk about everything and nothing. I'd come over, and sometimes we would just sleep, or I'd take his shirts. We'd drown the world out, and I think of those times. We felt like young gods... "And I've been sitting at the bottom of a swimming pool / For a while now, drowning my thoughts out, the sounds / But do you feel like a young God? / You know the two of us are just young gods"
Score: 10/10
16.
I Walk the Line: This song got me a bit teary, because this girl has really created an album that feels like a strip of my soul was embedded into it. This song in general feels a lot more like now, in present day, and I loved that this was the last song. Her rendition of it was just... WOW. Like I said, it was the perfect closing. Whereas the other songs, with the exception of maybe "Colors" feel reflective or just looking back... this, it just doesn't. It makes me want to close my eyes and sit on my great grandfather's old piano. I think about how, "I keep a close watch on this heart of mine
/ I keep my eyes wide open all the time." I know what it's like to feel someone shatter your heart, and I have these eyes and walls that I find a hard time allowing others the opening to hurt me... Then there's the whole, "I find it very, very easy to be true / I find myself alone when each day is through / Yes, I'll admit that I'm a fool for you," bit that makes me smile. I think about how hard it is for some people to be alone, but I like this verse. I like that I can relate to it, because I don't have a problem staying loyal and honest when that person isn't in my direct view... I find peace in it. I think people often are in relationships not for the feelings, but because they don't want to be alone. I like the idea of having someone and even when they're not there having them there, as in knowing that the connection won't shatter that easily. It's a bond that can withstand. It's such a simple song, and it feels like just peace... The whole internal struggle just feels like it's vanished with this... "You've got a way to keep me on your side / You give me cause for love that I can't hide / For you I know I'd even try to turn the tide / Because you're mine, I walk the line."
Score: 11/10
Overall, it's safe to say Halsey gave her all in her debut album. It tapped into all of these little corners of my soul. She didn't hold back giving us this journey of the Badlands that lives inside her. You see her go through these up and downs, and it leaves you in this state where you just can't blink... Like is this real? This place is just too real, and it happens to hold the darkest, most sinister parts of yourself as well as this resolution... If that isn't an experience, then I don't know what is! I'm simply blown away. I can't wait to see her grow more. I'm just at a loss for words... to be honest I just want to finish this up and go listen to it on repeat!
P.S. If you haven't gotten the album you can buy it
here!
Xx
